NFL Picks Week Eight: In Which I Suffer the Interminable Bye Week

Good lord I hate the bye week. Seriously, it drives me nuts. I know that a week to relax and heal all wounds is a necessity for a team that plays a sport as brutal and physical as American football, but if you're a dedicated soul who spends the first six days of the week anxiously awaiting Sunday, the bye week is like getting a date with the hottest girl in school and being picked up by your parents right before you're about to make out with her.

It's totally lame.

Fortunately, this year I get some vague distraction during the bye week because that whole World Series thing is happening, but since nothing has gone right for any member of the Texas Rangers -- with the possible exception of Bengie Molina -- that may not be lasting much longer. San Francisco has toppled Texas in the first two games with a combination of deciding to actually have an offense and apparently distracting Rangers slugger Josh Hamilton with some particularly unorthodox means. That may not be the best way to throw the recovering drug addict, who claims pot was never really his thing, but he certainly isn't making it up if the local media corroborates his story and it clearly isn't prevented the local establishments from trying to do what they can for the Giants.

Of course, with the Series headed back to Texas for Game 3 on Saturday night, I hardly think the series is over, but a two-game edge with a win over Jesus impersonator Cliff Lee in their back pockets sure makes the Giants look good with five games to go. I suspect the Rangers offense can't be held down for ever, so expect a breakout in Game 3 in Arlington that extends the series into next week, but I can't fathom the Rangers winning four games if it means going through Tim Lincecum, Matt Cain and Jonathan Sanchez twice.

And that should be fine by everyone. After all, the Rangers have started to give us reasons to root against them, and a parade in San Francisco for the Giants would be pretty groovy. Man.

And by the time the World Series is done I'll actually have the New York Football Giants' Nov. 7 showdown with Seattle to look forward to. Everybody wins. And by then maybe the Devils will have started to crawl out of that cozy 2-7-1 hole they've given themselves to start the season. On the downside, the Knicks, who have a winning record for the first time in more than 23 months may have regressed back to the mean by that time, too, but beggars can't be choosers.

They can embarrass themselves with awful football predictions however. and that's where we're headed right now.

Last week: 7-7-0
Season: 48-51-5

Miami (+2) over CINCINNATI
DALLAS (-7) over Jacksonville
DETROIT (-3) over Washington
KANSAS CITY (-8) over Buffalo
ST. LOUIS (-3) over Carolina
NY JETS (-6) over Green Bay
SAN FRANCISCO (even) over Denver
SAN DIEGO (-4) over Tennessee
Seattle (+4) over OAKLAND
Minnesota (+6) over NEW ENGLAND
Tampa Bay (+3) over ARIZONA
NEW ORLEANS (-1) over Pittsburgh
INDIANAPOLIS (-6) over Houston

That's the games, and a special note to all of you watching Sunday night's once-assumed Super Bowl preview in New Orleans, keep an eye out for Kim Partrick and her Guinness World Records partisans who will be tracking what could be the world's largest Halloween party.

Give it a look-see if you aren't on too much of a sugar high Sunday night.