Monday, July 25, 2011

Pat and John on...Smart Phones



Phones started out as a glorified pager, but unlike beepers, had the ability to call (for about $4 per minute) right at the scene instead of having to respond to a “911” alert on your beeper, and run to a payphone (remember those things?). But that’s all changed. They have gone from something you have in case of an emergency, to being so important that it’s actually an emergency if you don’t have it on you. They’ve replaced the wallet in terms of importance because you likely have as much financial information accessible on your phone as you do in your bi-fold.

That’s why going somewhere without your phone might as well be the same as going out with no clothes on. You’re stripped of technology. Even if you haven’t used your phone in several hours, the fact that you KNOW you don’t have that thing on you is going to drive you nuts. “But how am I going to look up what other movies Steve Buschemi has been in, whilst I walk to get lunch?” You’re not, and you’re lunch routine is ruined.

If we can compare phones to evolution (personally I believe God dropped smartphones from the heavens) the classic Nokia 3390--better known as ‘the brick’--is the equivalent of that first fish that grew legs and walked on land. The Zack Morris special was definitely the thing that we trace all modern phones to; the phone version of amoebas. But the 3390 was the first one to make cell phones accessible for everyone. And the amazing thing is, you can whack your simcard into that badboy right now, and it’s making a crystal clear call, til the battery craps out 20 minutes in. The phone was indestructible. I once fully submerged my 3390 in water after jumping straight into a pool. A 15-minute hair dryer session later and that thing was back in full use.

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